Perfectly Imperfect!

 

As my child is fast approaching her first year of amazing life, I have learned some things. I embrace all the imperfections I once thought I never would. I embrace the fact that I may hit the snooze button on my seven alarms at 6am which is when I should be walking out the door. I embrace the fact that the clothes may not get folded and put in the proper place. Who cares when they are clean! I embrace the fact that a home cooked meal may be a Tuna sandwich and chips sometimes. I set the bar pretty high for myself when I first became a Mom. See, we are all taught to do our absolute best and aim for perfection in this life (At least I was), and at first, I took this approach. It worked for my singular self and it worked very well! I had great success! Being a Mom, however, it was sustainable at first, but like most Moms finding their stride, I realized that there is so much beauty in living in the moment and not focusing on being perfect.

Perfect does not mean you did it all and achieved. Look at all the in between. I woke up late, great! I get more snuggle time with my baby girl! London blew up her diaper, yes, inconvenient! Hey! I got to bathe and look my baby in her eyes and kiss on her as I made her stinkies all fresh. I wake up with a simple prayer in my heart before she stirs, “Lord thank you for allowing me to see another day, to be a parent to my daughter, to help me to learn what appreciation is, thank you for everyone you have placed in my life and may you bless them as well as you will bless me.” These imperfect moments have taught me to be grateful for all I have and helped me focus on learning that life is richer when every little thing is appreciated. This is not to say that I do not get flustered. I have plenty of character building (Attitude adjusting) opportunities. I’ve learned from past mistakes and present victories to pray! “Lord what is it that you are wanting to teach me? What is it that I am needed to achieve to grow ?”  I have learned in this year of parenting to have an extreme appreciation for life. To not take it all for granted. At one time, I did not have the relationships, the ties, the joy that I have today. I once had no clue how happy my life could be. I found that the more I focus on God, the more enriched and blessed my life becomes, the more peace I have. My fruits are bearing some things and it took some pain to get to this place of growth. I look forward to becoming increasingly more grateful in my life as parenting is teaching me to be transparent, to be upfront and to live and embrace what I have.

Now, it was by God’s grace that I made it out the house at 6:13am with London and myself fully dressed for our day today. (Really Really though). But I sit back and I can laugh at the fact that I got out the door! Thought I would add that since it is my praise report for today! (VICTORAAAAYYYY)

Message to my beautiful young women

 

 

You have to know your worth, whether others are convinced you have any or not. If I placed my worth in the hands of other people and how they decided to view me, I would be on some shaky ground. Luckily, my worth is not placed in the hands of man, but God himself and if it was not for his grace, I would not be who I am and what I am today.

As individuals, we are valuable and all have purpose in our lives whether a person decides you are valuable or not. We typically seek acceptance from others and sometimes validation, and that can create people bondage. What if they do not like me? I wonder if they will be accepting of me despite if I have flaws or fail. You cannot place your self confidence in any other persons hands but God. By focusing on his will  and how he desires your life to be designed, you could never fail. God does not promise that there will not be trials and tribulations but he encourages us to lean into him in these times. Romans 8:28 teaches us that ALL(good and bad) things works together for the GOOD for those (yes even you!) according to HIS purpose. Not a man you desire to like you, not your boss for a promotion, but God. It takes the pressure off of trying to become what someone else would think we would need to be. You have a father, his name is God, he has a son named Jesus and those are the only two you need to seek.

As a wonderful blogger stated in her blog unashamed growth, “Don’t ever argue with someone over your worth. Don’t ever try to work to show someone you are worth love, respect, honor, or good things… God clearly believes in his work. Be confident in who you were created an the benefits that come along with it.”

So put your efforts into getting to know God and his Son, there is nothing but peace and prosperity on this side of eternity. Redirect your focus.  I hope this can encourage and benefit some person out there.

 

 

 

 

 

My New Normal

 

My life has been taken over by this little person, every inch of it. From the moment I awake with you in my arms, my life is all about you. Tonight you sleep in your crib, and I make the most of it. Most times it’s me straightening up my home and I find that in every room, there are reminants of you.

In the living room I pick up mounds of baby toys and put them in their place. I straighten out the kitchen and your clean bottles are on the drying rack, and baby food is proudly on display. I go to the bathroom, where my walk-in closet is and as I pass, I see your bouncer and bath toys. In my closet is a space, designated just for you.

Our room has your  swing and your crib and your changing table. I find there are always reminders that you are in my life. The car seat in my car, the emergency diapers, car toys, and stroller are all reminders of you. I even find when I am looking in my purse, a bow, some emergency wipes and a diaper are in tow. It’s amazing to me, that you have not only emcompassed my heart, but you have encompassed my life. Your Mother has enjoyed all 8 plus months of your life and I as I have said countless times am overjoyed, privilaged and honored to spend the rest of my days with you as your Mom. I love you booger bear.

 

 

A letter to my daughter

Hello London,

You are currently 2 months old and I have to say I love you to pieces. You are the joy of my life. I never thought my heart could swell so big, I never knew I could love so big, and you, yes you young lady are the cause of it. I think back on your journey into my life, and I believe you were brought here to give me a purpose. Some of that purpose is to pour into you, all of the good qualities I hold and, all of the ones I want you to have. You will be a wonder. You will be amazing. You are truly a blessing that inspires me to do better. You are motivation. I cannot wait to show you what success is, and that the climb to it is the hardest, but most important part. I think that everyone’s life you come into, you bring happiness . I only expected you to bring joy into my life and now I see that the happiness you give me expands into others lives.  When I prayed for joy and happiness in my life, it came in the most unexpected way, you. When you 1st arrived, I was unsure of what to do. Those big pretty eyes opened, and showed me that love still exists, it is still a reality. Now I know why children enrich a persons life, I now have 1st hand experience. Daughter, I want you to know God, I want you to know faith, I want to you to know that prayer works. Your existence is the proof. I love you London P. Tucker with all of my heart. Muah.

Post Baby Body

I know  that most women do not post
their post baby bodies,  but I will. Yes, I have stretchmarks and yes, my   linea nigra still present (dark line down your belly you can get while pregnant), but I want to tell you,  working out pre baby, and eating well, and breast feeding post baby really works. I could have really had an awesome post baby body, had I worked out during my pregnancy, but I did not. I am happy to say I lost all but 4lbs of my baby weight and my post baby body is leaner, my waist has shrunk tremendously. 

Eating when you are a Mom happens anywhere lol

I didn5 get stretchmarks until 36 weeks

Having a baby can be complicated,  especially when you are induced, and your epidural gives out during labor. Fun times. I commend any woman who had a natural delivery. It is NOT for the weary.  But the joy you recieve from bringing life in this world is something I just cannot put into words. My transition from a singular person to a woman with a child was seamless. I was “built for this” in the words of my child’s father. Here is my little bundle of joy, London Paige. WARNING! She is absolutely adorable!

She is one month old as of recent and we are both learning the ins and outs of eachother and breast feeding.  It’s awesome to give your child nourishment and watch them grow. It’s something a bond that only me and my little one share. All smiles.

Workout Free Weekend

My weekend was workout free, 

 

I decided not to be a superwoman and take it easy a couple of days out of the week. However, it was very active. I decided to sign up and volunteer with the Houston Humane Society and help them out at one of their mobile locations. We met bright and early at the facility, walked the dogs that were selected for the mobile (all still available for adoption if interested they range from 4 months – 2 years), loaded them up and went to Tom Bass Pro/Outdoor World. I underestimated the vastness of this place. It was like a mall for everything you would need for hunting, camping, fishing, atving and some. It was an amazing place. I would love to go back if I ever decide to deal with wildlife. LOL. Anyways my dog of the day was Winter. She was a 4 month old lab mix (Who I mistook for a boy LOL) and she was very cute. She was cuddly, she was a little shy but everyone who petted her she wagged her tail for. I taught her to climb the stairs and fed her a million treats and after a few hours, she was exhausted. She stopped walking with me at one point and just had the most cute exhausted expression ever. So, you know what I did? I did this:

 

 

Held her like the baby she was. She let me and I took advantage. I kept handing her off to people and they ate it up. She almost got adopted this way a few times. LOL. My dog never allows me to hold him like this he has far too much spunk to be associated with this cuddly calm hold, so I had to get my 30 minutes in. After the mobile I helped out at the facility for a few more hours and went home to shower and change. I started to study for the GMAT, and almost forgot an appointment I had at Walgreens. In order to get into school you have to have a meningitis shot and I have no clue if I ever got one. So I got one. I then proceeded to go to the store and I had a craving for Crab Legs. I made them a little too spicy but it was sooooo goood! 

 

Yum. So I ended the day with a movie. Iron Man. MAN HOLD UP! It was amazing. Must see I recommend it! So I finally passed out. Sunday I spent the day with my dog, studied for 2 hours and went to brunch with a friend at Baby Barnaby’s and the dog park and ended the night with a few Reality TV shows.  Action packed eventful, and not a single workout was done. This week however Monday – Thurday! It goes down! 

 

It’s My Birthday!

It’s My Birthday! It’s my birthday. 28 today I’m in 1st place. I have received tons of well wishes and Instagram posts from my friends. I feel loved. Thanks to everyone I appreciate you all! I made it to 28! I am happy with where I am at in my present life and I am looking forward to the new experiences I will embark on. I have a career, I have ambition, I have a 401k! I am blessed to take vacations! I love to workout! I enjoy being a pet owner! I love the Lord! I am just grateful. Thursday I will be going to Vegas  and as they say these days I’m going to TURN UP! Hopefully, I won’t wake up in a new Bugatti, because the way my bank account is set up….. I owe Sallie Mae. LOL.

 

On a fitness note. I tried a new workout yesterday and got my heart rate all the way up to 185! Wow! I also broke the machine but that didn’t stop me! lol try it out if you dare!

 

Goodbye 2012, Hello 2013

Well,

2012 was an absolute blast!!!! I can really say that genuinely I got to bond with my best girlfriends, I almost bought a house, I traveled, I learned even more to appreciate my family, I grew closer with both of my sisters, I also found out there are limits to friendships and who you circle yourself around, and that I am really loved. That was the best gift of all!

This year will be just as great, and even if it isn’t I know there is a life lesson in it. I have new fitness goals, I have new life goals, and career goals I feel need to be accomplished this year. I know I can achieve all of them, and with my support system I have now, I know I can succeed.

Here are some pics of my New Years.

Me and my cousin Rosa.

;

I hope everyone else had a great New Years!

The Not So Perfect Story of My So-Called Love Life

It started out fine. You wanted the things I wanted. In the beginning your effort was more than evident. A call here a text there, a curiosity about me was there. The more you found out and placed yourself in my world, the more I wanted you there. I wanted feelings to blossom; I wanted the care and affection I’ve been searching for to begin. Then, it seems, you became bored. Your texts became fewer, your calls non-existent, plans got canceled, and you didn’t mind not seeing me for weeks at a time. I tried to let you know that my time was valuable and it backfired. This led to more canceled times, more disappointment. You said you were busy and stretched thin. Starved for your attention, I let you know what I could handle, and the few and far in betweens, was not my idea of romance. It seems it fell on deaf ears, and you continued to be too busy to see my interest in you was fading. Or was it that you wanted it to fade? Did you make a choice to frustrate me to the point of not speaking, or even having bitterness towards you? I hope not. Never was I worried that another wouldn’t have the same excitement as you in the beginning. I was just hoping your interest, unlike the others would be more permanent. Looks like I was wrong, you ARE just like the others. So, I really have to do myself a favor and move on.