“A healthy you is the best gift you can give your family emotionally, spiritually, and 

mentally.”

-Joyce Meyer

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Hey there!

I have not posted on my blog in some time. Months actually. If you are wondering why, it was because I had nothing positive to say. Absolutely nothing. I had nothing encouraging to say because I was in need of encouragement myself. I guess you could say a part of me did not want to blog because if I were to be candid, I would be airing my dirty laundry and possibly disrupting my peace, another part of me was suffering in silence.  Those selfies I have been posting on Instagram and Facebook, well they were happy moments but deep inside I was living in hell, living in torment, and praying to God for relief of it all. I was waiting on someone to save me from the trials and tribulations I found myself in. A super hero in a cape with extra starch. Once I came to the conclusion that no one was going to save me but myself, I began to try to rebuild. I turned to the best thing I could, my spirituality. My faith. My God. I needed to lean into him more than ever in my time of need. In this turbulent moment in my life.

What was it that was tormenting me? A custody case. It has been the the thorn in my side. I tried to fake it, smile through it all. The truth. I struggled and I find myself still struggling through it. When the communication breaks down between two parents, the results can be absolutely awful. When you experience disagreement to this level, sabotage takes hold. It would give me great pleasure to find a medium and co-parent peacefully. When you are involved with someone who is emotionally driven and convinced you are an enemy, there is no way co-parenting can take place.

So, the best thing I can do is accept the things I cannot change. I accept that this is a flawed situation. I speak into existence that things will turn around and get better and we will find our channel to communicate properly. I pray that we will spend our money on our child versus our lawyers and other frivolous things that come with custody issues. I have learned, I can only control my peace, my sanity, and my actions and cannot wish, ask, or request that others comply and do the same. I must accept that things will be this way for some time. Is this what I thought parenthood would be? tumultuous? Absolutely not. I know there are no perfect formulas or magic potions to getting it right.

Overall I had to check my feelings, outside of this situation was my life happy? Absolutely. Did I have to breathe life into the situation? No. So I made a choice. To feed nothing and I mean nothing into the situation. To let the thing die. So Sunday is the only interaction that I have with my child’s Father and that is even minuscule. He is to place his daughter in her car seat and have zero interaction with me.  This is not what I envisioned co-parenting to be, but it is required to be this way for some time. I choose not to air the grievances I have with him in full detail, but I am not in high approval of his actions, and others on his behalf, because they do not benefit our daughter and her well being period. I am convinced that he is upset about something and he is seeking revenge of some sort without looking at what the cost is. You(at least for me) have to get to that pivotal point in your life where you ask, What is best for our daughter? Do I want peace, or do I want to be right? What does peace cost and what does being right cost? That is something he will have to figure out . For me I choose peace. it is free, fabulous, fantastic, and gives me life. It gives me the ability to focus on the precious time that my daughter is growing. She is learning and growing so fast. I do not want it to wiz by me and I am focused on custody issues.

Now that I am in a more positive place, I feel redeemed. Freed and I can now share the wonderful moments and accounts that I have with my daughter as well as the adventures of living life in the 30 year old lane. Life is great and short, and I intend to be intentional about living a really good life. Praise God for clarity and grace, without it I would not have been able to get to this pivotal most freeing moment in my life. My custody case is not over, hopefully the end of it is in the early part of November, but I have moved past it.

Perfectly Imperfect!

 

As my child is fast approaching her first year of amazing life, I have learned some things. I embrace all the imperfections I once thought I never would. I embrace the fact that I may hit the snooze button on my seven alarms at 6am which is when I should be walking out the door. I embrace the fact that the clothes may not get folded and put in the proper place. Who cares when they are clean! I embrace the fact that a home cooked meal may be a Tuna sandwich and chips sometimes. I set the bar pretty high for myself when I first became a Mom. See, we are all taught to do our absolute best and aim for perfection in this life (At least I was), and at first, I took this approach. It worked for my singular self and it worked very well! I had great success! Being a Mom, however, it was sustainable at first, but like most Moms finding their stride, I realized that there is so much beauty in living in the moment and not focusing on being perfect.

Perfect does not mean you did it all and achieved. Look at all the in between. I woke up late, great! I get more snuggle time with my baby girl! London blew up her diaper, yes, inconvenient! Hey! I got to bathe and look my baby in her eyes and kiss on her as I made her stinkies all fresh. I wake up with a simple prayer in my heart before she stirs, “Lord thank you for allowing me to see another day, to be a parent to my daughter, to help me to learn what appreciation is, thank you for everyone you have placed in my life and may you bless them as well as you will bless me.” These imperfect moments have taught me to be grateful for all I have and helped me focus on learning that life is richer when every little thing is appreciated. This is not to say that I do not get flustered. I have plenty of character building (Attitude adjusting) opportunities. I’ve learned from past mistakes and present victories to pray! “Lord what is it that you are wanting to teach me? What is it that I am needed to achieve to grow ?”  I have learned in this year of parenting to have an extreme appreciation for life. To not take it all for granted. At one time, I did not have the relationships, the ties, the joy that I have today. I once had no clue how happy my life could be. I found that the more I focus on God, the more enriched and blessed my life becomes, the more peace I have. My fruits are bearing some things and it took some pain to get to this place of growth. I look forward to becoming increasingly more grateful in my life as parenting is teaching me to be transparent, to be upfront and to live and embrace what I have.

Now, it was by God’s grace that I made it out the house at 6:13am with London and myself fully dressed for our day today. (Really Really though). But I sit back and I can laugh at the fact that I got out the door! Thought I would add that since it is my praise report for today! (VICTORAAAAYYYY)

A letter to my daughter

Hello London,

You are currently 2 months old and I have to say I love you to pieces. You are the joy of my life. I never thought my heart could swell so big, I never knew I could love so big, and you, yes you young lady are the cause of it. I think back on your journey into my life, and I believe you were brought here to give me a purpose. Some of that purpose is to pour into you, all of the good qualities I hold and, all of the ones I want you to have. You will be a wonder. You will be amazing. You are truly a blessing that inspires me to do better. You are motivation. I cannot wait to show you what success is, and that the climb to it is the hardest, but most important part. I think that everyone’s life you come into, you bring happiness . I only expected you to bring joy into my life and now I see that the happiness you give me expands into others lives.  When I prayed for joy and happiness in my life, it came in the most unexpected way, you. When you 1st arrived, I was unsure of what to do. Those big pretty eyes opened, and showed me that love still exists, it is still a reality. Now I know why children enrich a persons life, I now have 1st hand experience. Daughter, I want you to know God, I want you to know faith, I want to you to know that prayer works. Your existence is the proof. I love you London P. Tucker with all of my heart. Muah.

Post Baby Body

I know  that most women do not post
their post baby bodies,  but I will. Yes, I have stretchmarks and yes, my   linea nigra still present (dark line down your belly you can get while pregnant), but I want to tell you,  working out pre baby, and eating well, and breast feeding post baby really works. I could have really had an awesome post baby body, had I worked out during my pregnancy, but I did not. I am happy to say I lost all but 4lbs of my baby weight and my post baby body is leaner, my waist has shrunk tremendously. 

Eating when you are a Mom happens anywhere lol

I didn5 get stretchmarks until 36 weeks

Having a baby can be complicated,  especially when you are induced, and your epidural gives out during labor. Fun times. I commend any woman who had a natural delivery. It is NOT for the weary.  But the joy you recieve from bringing life in this world is something I just cannot put into words. My transition from a singular person to a woman with a child was seamless. I was “built for this” in the words of my child’s father. Here is my little bundle of joy, London Paige. WARNING! She is absolutely adorable!

She is one month old as of recent and we are both learning the ins and outs of eachother and breast feeding.  It’s awesome to give your child nourishment and watch them grow. It’s something a bond that only me and my little one share. All smiles.

What I am thankful for

It is that time of the year again,

It’s awesome to share with people what you are thankful for. Not just at Thanksgiving or the Holidays, but overall. I tend to like to reflect on my year and state what I am most thankful for and here is my list in no particular order.

Peace of Mind

This year, my life has had some trying times, I have had a lot of things that would make you ask the Lord why is this happening to me, and instead of asking that question, I always think it that there is a reason for everything, and these things are lessons I can take, good or bad. I am thankful, through all of my struggles in relationships, friendships, and life in general that I have Peace of mind.

 

 

 

 

 

Family
The next thing I am grateful for is my growing family. We are at the stage in our lives where new additions are being added to the family. This year I got the opportunity to meet my beautiful niece Kayla, and share in a true family bonding moment with my Oldest Brothers first child.

I am also grateful for my family overall, we are not the closest knit group, but when we get together, it is evident it is all love and fun. Tonight we are having a fish fry and it will be good to see my siblings, as I do not get to see them on a regular basis.

Friends

Where do I start?! My friends have been absolutely important to my life, I confide in them, I take trips with them, they are my hairdressers and stylists, shop, and get into all kinds of shenanigans with them. Without them, I know I would have gotten into some trouble. You chicas keep me on the right track. I appreciate and love you all!

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Fitness

The other thing I have found this year that has been extremely important is taking control of my health and lifestyle. I lost 25lbs this year after an eye opening visit from the doctor about my health and where it was headed. I had slightly high cholesterol, I am pre diabetic, and I was slightly overweight. I went from 198lbs to 172! Which is great for someone my size (6foot giant). I would not have connected with the people I have through fitness had I not took a strong stance on my health and started a blog, and met wonderful people. The connections you make are amazing! So Let’s get lifted!!!

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What are you Thankful for? Any good foods that you are making for this Holiday?

Shoulders, Calves and Abs

 

Yesterday I hit the gym pretty hard and rocked out my workout. I did my shoulders, calves and abs. I thought the workout would be easy being that there were not that many exercises. No. My shoulders were on fire and I had the slow disoriented waddle, when I walked out the gym yesterday. My workout consisted of:

20 mins on the elliptical

150 reps, per side of Seated bar bell twists w/ 20lb bar

3 sets to failure in 15 reps of Side Lateral raises w/10lb 

3 sets to failure in 15 reps  of Front Dumbbell Raises w/ 10lbs 

Superset of 

3 sets to failure in 12 reps of Side lateral raises w/ 5lbs

3 sets to failure in 15 reps of Front Dumbbell Raises w/ 10lbs 

Machine Shoulder Military Press w/ 25lbs

1 warm up set of 8 reps

3 sets to failure in 15 reps

7 sets of Seated bent over Rear Delt Raises in 15 reps w/ 15 lbs 

Standing Calf Raises 1 warm up set of 10 reps and 5 sets of 20 reps

3 sets to failure 20 reps each of Sit ups

Elliptical for 20 mins

150 twists w/ 20lb bar

 

I was pooped I tell you!!!  I also noticed this amazing phenomenon. A lot of women do not lift. I got a lot of stares and questionable looks as to why I was in the free weights area. Usually a woman is accompanied by a man in this area to be trained briefly or they are just passing by. So, it is overall a male dominated area. Most women dominate the cardio equipment. I would like to encourage all of my female fitness enthusiasts to join me! Come to the weight area. It is not a scary place, it actually is a great place to look at men! lol See the various forms and different workouts that other people do. I am a beginner out there in the weighted world, but I would like to see women get their weights, and toning in too! I am all about showing these guys what I can do! The stares were welcomed by me, and I even got a few smiles out the guys when they saw me working hard!

 

Today is leg day and I have my handicap sticker ready lol. I may be crawling out the gym when I finish wish me luck.

 

 

Photo credit: Womenshealthmagazine.com

Rainy Weekend

Rain was all that happened this weekend. So I took this as an opportunity to relax, and get back to my leisure lifestyle of life. I started out my weekend by going to get my hair done, and running a few errands, and ended up unpacking some boxes. In between that, I watched a movie, played with my dog, attempted to take a nap, unpacked some more, and worked on homework. I got it all done! I also went to the gym and got a beasty back and biceps workout in. I still cannot do a pull up, so I had to skip that. I will get better. I can tell I am getting stronger, though. Any progress is great progress.  I also ate pretty horrible this week/weekend. Fried foods, Mexican foods, desserts you name it I ate it. In moderation though. So I am maintaining my weight,  but not my precious abdominal muscles *tear*, but that’s okay, every now and then you need to eat freely. Give the body a break from not being tempted to eat every cookie in sight and managing to resist can be tough and weary sometimes.

I spent all of Sunday arraigning my room, speaking with my Mom, submitting homework and playing fetch with the Gizster.

Today I will be working on Shoulders abs and legs and will post about it on tomorrow, and this week will be all about reviewing my Chapters for the up and coming midterms I have on this weekend. I am also apart of a skit for my Company’s annual BBQ Cook off and I have a friend coming into town to visit for her PV Homecoming. So my peaceful weekend was welcomed and appreciated. When I will get another? Who knows! Stay foxy people!

Moving Weekend

My weekend was full of cardboard!

Literally. I woke bright and early to get my rented U-Haul, and had movers move my major furniture into storage. It was really Humid with no wind so things got a little sticky. I wore shorts and a loose shirt and that still did not help things. I got a few cat calls though LOL! After that a friend came over to help me make a few trips and I had to go back to the new place to make sure the AT&T guy connected my service. I have to have Showtime. I cannot be without it! He had trouble finding whatever the connector thing is to the phone lines, I ended up finding it. He just overall did a mediocre job. After that I was pooped. I took a long break and relaxed in the bed. I got hungry and decided to go get some food. I took my dog, Gizmo, out to go potty, and ended up getting locked out. 3 hours later, I finally got my brother to unlock the door.

After that I met up with my step sister to have a glass of wine and enjoy a live band, I almost fell asleep 1 hour into the set, thanks to me not realizing I was exhausted. So I went to my new home to sleep. I slept like a brick! I woke up and went back to my old apartment and in about 3 trips, I was completely moved out. I woke up at 5am to buy a shirt for our Customer Service Week at my job (I was on the committee) and meet up with the wonderful ladies who cleaned my apartment. Superb Cleaning Service is someone I highly recommend!

Check out my photos!

I hope everyone’s weekend was eventful! I am taking a day off of my workouts since this weekend I did basically the elliptical carrying boxes up and down the stairs.

Leg Day!

Today was Legs day!

I started out my workout by carrying boxes to my car (Cardio) from my soon to be old 3rd floor apartment.

After that I put in this type of work.

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I really did not want to do this workout, I was thinking of the bajillion things I needed to do today and was like, how in the heck will I even have energy to even look at this. I looked at the workout and it was simple quick and I worked it out!

Tonight I need to break down my bedframe, get lots of newspaper to pack my dishes, find my check book, I packed it somewhere and I have no clue where it is, pay my last little rent and pack up some more kicknacks that need to go to my new space.

I forgot, I need to do homework, but I think I will do all of it on Sunday. I have to secure my move first. Wish me luck!

High School Reunion

This weekend was action packed!

My boyfriend came into town for my 10 year high-school reunion. When I say we had fun honey! We had fun.

Friday night was the kickoff event and we went to a place in Pearland called the Fox Den. They have a nice bar, good music and a bull. It was good to see everyone and let me say we all were dancing and as we like to call it. Turning up!

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Whew that was some fun. The next day I went to see the new movie Baggage Claim with my guy (It was very funny!)  and we got ready for the actual reunion look at us.

They had an open bar and I took advantage and got…. A little happy lol.

We had so much fun. The next day I struggled a little, but I was encouraged to get up and workout. I did my shoulders exercise and that consisted of :

20 minute cardio on the eliptical

Smith Machine Overhead Shoulder Press

Machine Shoulder (Military Press)

Side Lateral Raises

Side Lateral Raise starting behind back.

Dumbbell Shrug

Reverse Machine Flys

10 Minute Cardio

Good little workout. I need to work on my Side Lateral Raises. A 10 lb weight gave me absolute hell! Overall it was a good weekend and I am ready for this week. It will be a busy one. Seriously, I do not know when I will not ever be busy. My schedule/plate is so full. This week I am in the process of moving. So this Monday, I woke up at 7ish to load my car with two large boxes of clothes and one medium box of stuff.  I need to do that everyday this week in order to have the majority of my boxes out of my house. I will have some movers come and take my furniture down my stairs and help me get it to my storage. I also need to clean as much as I can, so that I won’t get charged an arm and a leg! I can do it in between working out, caking , writing a paper, and doing homework and reading assignments for school right?

Monday’s  Calves and Abs workout consisted of:

10 min cardio

Standing Calf Raises

2 warm up sets of 10 reps

4 sets of 12 reps

Donkey calf raises

4 sets to failure 18 reps

Hanging Leg Raises

3 sets to failure in 20 reps

10 min cardio

I did this on my lunch break. I found time! I did it. Calve workouts are tough! Donkey calf raises hurrrrt! I did surprisingly well on my hanging leg raises. Here is my video!

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Tomorrow is  Back and Biceps day and I don’t know where or how I will fit in the cardio. I am guessing I can take my box moving and trade that in as 20 minutes of cardio? LOL I will find time somewhere. I just wish there were more hours in the day!